Queen of Hearts

  Yo ! 
  Yesterday a couple got married, and i was like...so? 
  Hahaha, they are a cute couple ~
  so, these past few days i continue messaging Nik. 
  my friends say i like him, i denied that, 
  then Sara and Razanna said he likes me... 
  i have this urge to ask him if he likes me for myself, but i'm scared! 
  nik said that his 176cm tall, and i like guys taller then me! 
  hahaha, anyway... nut and i , we are okayy, i guess... 
  nothing to say now, 
  so, time for Random Pictures and bla bla time !

I really hate ...

WHAT I REALLY HATE IS ASHLAH BEING SUCH A JERK !!!!!

UGH!!!!!

What Do You Actually Want ( ? )

  I dont know what you want or need anymore 
  Do you still need me to be a friend ? 
  Or do you need me to be a " backup " friend ? 
  You have a lot of new friends right ? 
  Cant they replace me ? 
  I know you will never forgive me for not letting you know the truth 
  but , does that mean our reletionship will change ? 
  I know it hurts. 
  It hurts me too. 
  I'm not saying that i am not at fault. i am. 
  But , what do you want actually ? 
  You want to go back to those old days ? 

  well then , i think i said all the things i wanted to say. 

  i do hope we could go back to being friends 

  but, i hope you prove that you really want to be my friend again 

  if you dont , then please dont keep repeating the past . 

  thousands of love ,

   Alyson 

Stars that will Shine .

  Shine . That what you do the best ~ 

A teacher told me once that if you try hard enough
you will reach your goal in a blink of an eye.
how much is "hard enough" ?

There is this teacher. He is my disiplin teacher " Encik Yusoff "
he came in my class on Wednesday and on Thursday.
he told my class two different stories that have a lot of similar meanings.
the first story is about this four walis also known as god people ?
i think.
there were asked to bulid pillars, the three first walis were
hardworking but the fourth one always sleep.
haha.
they were given 40-days to finish their pillars.
the fourth wali waited for the 40th day to finish it.
yes, we all know this kind of story.
the life lesson is dont do things at the last minute and
you should get rid of the laziness act of yours.
hahaha
then he started talking about "stars"
that made me motivated to do this post.
hahha
he said that to be a star you should act like one.
so, one we will meet up there when we become ture stars.
if you a muslim then you'll know about these stars
in your al-quran, right?
hahaha,
the second story is about encik yusoff's past.
his sister actually.
he said his sister is not beautiful like other girls..

it is sad.

his cousin is very beautiful and in her life,

she always find love while others were studying.

his sister was studying while other were finding love.

so, i think you guys know what will happen next.

the less pretty one is succesful while the pretty one

married a drug addict.

yeah, the end..

nee...your kind of cute ~

So, on Sunday i added this dude named   Nik Haziri   on facebook.

His a fun guy to chat with.

So, just now like about 12 minutes ago,

we IMed each other and i asked him a random question.

our conversation :-

Me :    Alyson  

Him :   Nik Haziri 

  Okay, we started of talking about random stuff.
  he told me he never halau anyone before, because i asked him 
  if his halau-ing me. 
  haha .
 then i asked him:- 

  me : hey , arent you getting bored of me yet ?
 Nik  : mm, no. your interesting. *smiley*
  me : what ? haha . well , you are weird .
  sorry for asking a random question .
 Nik : thank you ! ahaha, i think your question is fresh. 
  me : fresh ?
 Nik : yeah. your the first girl to ask me that kind of question.
  me : haha . but i dont think fresh is the word for it ...
 Nik : then, i guess your special. *smiley*

 i then was dumbfounded as i didnt know what to reply .
  then i just continued chatting with him like normal .
 then he said he wanted to offline


  me :okay , umm...when will you be online again ? 
 Nik : tomorrow. but not on wednesdays.
  me : aw , okay then . i guess this is goodbye .
 Nik : yup. for now only laa.esk boleh chat lagi .
  me : yurp ! hehe . i'll miss you .
 Nik : haha . i'll miss you too . cute girl .

- the end -

haha .
isnt that kinda of cute ?
he said i was special and cute!
bonus !
hahaha.
dont jealous ~
hik hik .
well, i was stunned when he wrote cute cute stuff at me ~
hahaha.
but, dont worry ,i ionly like one guy for now.
nik is just a friend !
: )

. . 実現 . .

Dear you,

I have noticed something rather strange,

and that is that i've realized something.

1. Watashi wa hidoi tomodachida

2. Watashi wa jibun besutofurendo o ai dayo, to omou

 

 " A little nightingle said to me,

if friends are willing to help you in anything,

then a best friend is willing to die for you.

............pause...........

But, unforetunetly this is realilty. "

- Rainbow Unicorn -

( the liar )

: ]

Regrets Kill ( ? )

In our lives,

we do alot of things we simply regret.

but, regreting is just not enough.

sorry is never enough.

so, what should we do?

but, we can never run away from our mistakes.

we can never "not jugde a book by its cover"

we can never not "lie"

because, if we are actually human beings,

we were not created to be prefect.

we were created to be human beings.

so, i apologize for the things i did and regreted.

now, it is time to let my regrets blow with the wind.

   ~ I apologize to my mother for being the imprefect one ~ 

   ~ I apologize to my uncle for never giving him a last goodbye ~   

   ~ I apologize to my brother that i hated before ~ 

   ~ I apologize to my father for the wrongs i've ever did ~  

   ~ I apologize to the people i've hated ~  

   ~ i apologize to the grandparents i did not get to meet ~  

   ~ i apologize to the family members i've disliked ~  

   ~ I apologize to the bugs i've killed ~  

   ~ I apologize to 'him' for never letting him know my secret ~ 

   ~ I apologize to the friends i've annoyed ~  

   ~ I apologize for the stuff i said and could never take back ~ 

   ~ I apologize to those i've envyed ~  

   ~ Lastly, i apologize to my followers/readers who had to read this ~ 

The list above proves that i am one of those imprefect human beings

and the only thing i can do is say sorry.

the regrets will only lift off if the other acceptes your apology.

"Forgive and Forget"

I can never forget what i was forgiven for.

i always wonder why ?

Words we sometimes use .

    That is the word ,   

   "I love you"  

   yurp ! this post i'm going to write those words up there  

   in many different languages !  

   EnJoY ! ! ~

我愛你

( wo ai ni - Chinese )

Miluju tě

( Czech )

Jeg elsker dig

( Danish )

ik hou van je

( Dutch )

je t'aime

( French )

mé ngrá leat

( Irish )

Ho amate

( Italian )

私はあなたを愛して

( watashi wa anata wo aishite - japanese )

당신을 사랑합니다

( dangsin-eul salanghabnida - korean )

saya cintai kamu

( malay )

que te amo

( portuguese )

te amo

( Spanish )

Jag älskar dig

(swedish )

   plenty of thanks to ggogle !   

freaking awesome ( ! )

I dont like jumping the gun , but your post just makes me
so paranoid !
i thought i told you this before ,
if you got something to say , say it to my face !
how dare you put your disgusting words in my mouth !
Derr...
when did i say that i was perfect ?
when did i say i dont make mistakes ? !
this kind of attitude is the kind where friends start
becoming past friends !
just what , you can add another name to you "past friends list"

P.S:// consider me no more one of your friends!
and stop posting about a stranger laa!
you get off of my life and i'll disappear from yours!.
BYE-BYE!

Capital "H"

   H stands for plently of things..  

   including:- 

   honestly  

  honourable 

   hollaback girl ! 

  husband?! 

  but the only H word i'm saying to you is 'HATE' 
  well, too bad for you ~ 
   peace out home doggie! 

I'll erase every second.

I have a confession to make.

And its not a very good one.

I'm doing a bad deed right now, and that is

hurting a friend, or somebody that was a friend.

But, i came up to this conclusion to just do the best thing

that is possible and that is to forget.

Forget everything.

Erasing the good and bad times.

In a blink of an eye,

everything is gone when you need it the most.

I hope i will be forgiven from the things i did wrong

and be remembered for the things i did right.

i wanna keep faking a smile,

Rainbow Unicorn

When the world spins

I like to make myself believe,
that when the world spins i will be one step closer to you.
But unforetunetly,
the only that happens to the world is that everything grows older.
And if i start now, i'd probably be a few step ahead of you.
With or without the world's help.

now i can say that it was you all along,

the one who was a friend to me.

thank you. = )

Missing words

    answers to your questions!!   

okay, so...i'm not very rajin to write down all 123 questions,

so, here are 6 questions my readers asked me~

why 6 you ask? well, simply cause,

1 + 2 + 3 = 6

xDD

    Q1. are you single? (asked by acay)    

     A1. well, yes i am..    

     Q2. do you like spongebob? (asked by Mika)

     A2. of course i do!!    

     Q3. if you could kiss anyone of your friends, who would it be?
     (asked by jo)  

     A3. wad? xDD i guess it would have to be A******    

     Q4. do you like blogging? (asked by earthluver445)  

     A4. yes. yes i do actually.   

     Q5. are you the smartest in class? (asked by Julie2Jon)   

     A5. nope. i'm in the middle. but i'm aimming to be the smartest!   

     Q6. why do you like Japan so much? (asked by Anne_Lois)

     A6. well, i love japanese stuff as in anime, comic and etc..
   but i dont love japan. 

    they do serious cruel things to sea mammals! and i'm againts
   animal cruelitly!  

    but i dont hate japan though!!!   

     we can say that i like Japan! >,<   

___________________________________________

    real post of the day!   

I cant say it to his face.

I can keep glancing at him without saying a word.

But, i can help but to blush when he talks to me!

I dont know what to say.

I just know how to stare and do nothing.

I'd like to say something like, "good morning" or "Hello"..

and I know that he'll reply happily with the smile of his ~

But, i cannot fall in love with him now...

because 2 of my good friends likes him,

and they liked him before i did....

so, it isnt fair to them.

     but, life is unfair.   

but, i wont give up ~

:' )

heart broken !

    okay! i know la i'm not as smart as your son!   

    but that doesnt mean you could just say something   

    so insensative!!   

    are you like trying to break my hope of surviving or something!!?   

    god! i really cant believe that you would call yourself my father!   

    do you think by saying that, it would make me like motivated??!   

    hell yes!!   

    i'm going to get straight A's to prove that your freaking wrong!   

    and then i can finally get away from all of YOU!!!   

    it hurts you know, knowing that a family member, my own father   

    would say that i would never get straight A's   

    it hurts worst then someone stabbing you!   

    i promise! i will get 7 A's and prove you all wrong!   

    you can believe me on that   

  this was a post to release stress. 

  sorry for wasting your time 

  good night. 

  = ) 

  p.s:// the word YOU doesnt mean my dear readers, 
  it means that to those people who looked down on me 
  but i cant be so sure that i would actually get 7 A's right? 
  thats way i am going to focus harder and study harder and get a good resualt! 

123 question for Rainbow Unicorn~

        this is going to be my 123th post!       

just because of that i wanted to do this ask Rainbow Unicorn

thing so you can ask me annnyything yoouu wanna~

feel free to ask!!
and post your question on my chat box kay~

thanks! : )

p.s:// the questions will be answered in my other post.

never thought it would hurt

I need a moment to stop and think!

okay, so i told this sorta secret to my friend.

and i somehow feel like i'm betraying my other friend..

ugh, it's kinda weird that i would feel that..

maybe it's god's punishment for being a terrible friend!

well, thats all i wanted to say, so because

this update is quite short i'll make it longer!

WHAT I DID AT SCHOOL JUST NOW ~

reached at school like about 6:45am.

went to class and fixed a broken stapler.

razana, atyn, and dayan was there.

went to 3 dinamik and chatted with khuzi.

sarah finally arrived and she and i went and met up with

Hidayah, Ain and Ameerah.

talked about Justin Bieber and Random stuff.

bla bla bla

wanted to pj but the teacher didnt come so we ended up

watching the upperclassmen play sepak takrow and volleyball.

the volleyball atmost hit us !!

after that studied Mathes and did not understand one thing.

then, it was rehat and sara and i ate nasi goreng

bla bla bla

when english was over Jeje and Paula left me alone...

huhuhu.

i ended up walking in circles because thats what i'm good at doing!

in the end found them at the cabin.

then learnt sains.

went back with acha and got home.

did stuff and other stuff.

onlined facebook at 4 something and paula asked me

if i was happy.

i said i am not. but i'll still smile for the sake of smiling~

and then i thought, hey..i should update my blog...

so i did . . .

the end~   :  )

Just like those times~

i'm writing this post for the girl with a blog that

is called "Dirty Little Secrets"

i know you.

i know that your not prefect.

none of us are.

i try to be a friend that would always stay by your side.

but now when i look back i noticed one thing about you

and that is that you always hurt me.

dont you see it?

dont you notice it?

now i'm telling you this, i love you as a friend and i hate it that

you always do things that would make me and the others dislike you.

i dont want to repeat the past,

i dont want to go through those times where we fought

i dont!

so open your eyes and realize something.

you have friends.

you dont have "a" friend and once you notice that,

then, our friendship will automatically go back to the way it was.

you must be thinking that these couple of weeks i've been avoiding you,

and i hate every single second of what i'm doing to you.

but, you have to realize it! god dammit!

you make me so angry and sad..

i'm angry because you say things that is not from your mouth

and you make me so fucking sad because of the way you

make me feel that i'm at the bottom of your friend list!

so, i dont know after you read this that you'll hate me or what...

but the only thing i hope for you to get in this post is that

"we are friends"

and i guess god is making our relationship an inevitable one huh? : )

"The words we say can never be taken back

nor the actions we do.

But the only moments where we realize

the importent ones are always the ones

we take for granted"

i cried because of you!!! >: (